The headline to an article published recently in India Real Time (WSJ.com) read, “Can Chief Twit be far behind?” The reference was to the possibility that the Chief Twitter Officer may already be in existence. The article also mentions officers such as Chief Monster at Monster.com, Chief Internet Evangelist at Google and Chief Belief Officer at Future Group. Your humble blogger, who is known as the Chief Bulldog at the The COO’s Bulldog certainly is in good company.
Then there is the Chief Human Capital Officer at the US Department of Energy. I don’t know; I think I would rather be a person than capital, what do you think? Not to be outdone, another government agency has a Chief FOIA Officer. (Would that be pronounced “foya” or “foeea”?) It turns out that the Chief FOIA Officer works for the FCA, or the Farm Credit Agency, processing Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) requests that come to the agency. I wonder if the federal government has a Chief Acronyms Officer to make all of these up.
In an article on Greenbiz.com Ellen Weintraub complained that while she had seen plenty of Vice Presidents of Sustainability and Directors of Sustainability, she had yet to see a Chief Officer of Sustainability. Perhaps there is not enough work to keep that person busy, this making them more of a Chief Unsustainability Officer. When I looked up the definition of sustainable, I came across the words “carry on”. The Chief Carry On Officer would either be in charge of company parties or loading people on airplanes these days!
Then there is the Chief Green Officer; is the word green a noun denoting the person’s responsibilities or an adjective describing their color? Or is the Chief Green Officer simply another name for the CFO? It has gotten so bad that Steve Tobak, in his BNET column, The Corner Office, opines that we should no longer say C-Suite, but should rather use the term C-Tent!
Getting back to the Chief Twit; I worked for him a number of years ago, but fortunately did not stay long at that company!